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Dealing with Deception: What to Do When Someone Lies to You

Updated: Dec 27, 2023

what to do when someone lies to you

It's never easy to find out that someone you care about has lied to you. Whether it's a small white lie or a major betrayal, being deceived can cause a range of difficult emotions, from hurt and anger to confusion and pain to wariness. So, what should you do if someone lies to you? Here are some effective strategies for dealing with deception.

What to do When Someone Lies to You - 5 Steps

1. Take Time to Process Your Emotions

It's normal to feel upset and hurt when someone lies to you. Give yourself permission to feel these emotions, but try not to let them consume you. Allow yourself time to process your feelings, and then make a plan for how to move forward.

2. Communicate Your Feelings to the Person Who Lied to You

It's important to let the person know how their deception has affected you. Express your feelings in a calm and assertive manner. This will help to establish boundaries and give the person a chance to understand the impact of their actions.

3. Assess the relationship

After someone has lied to you, it's important to evaluate the relationship. Are you able to trust this person again? If not, it may be best to distance yourself from them. On the other hand, if the lie was a one-time mistake and the person is truly remorseful, forgiveness may be possible.

4. Seek Support

Dealing with deception can be a difficult and emotional process. Consider reaching out to a HOLD Listener, who can provide you with a safe and non-judgmental space to process your feelings and help you develop strategies for coping. Or in a situation of deep betrayal such as infidelity, seek therapeutic support.

5. Take Care of Yourself

Finally, remember to take care of yourself. Prioritize your emotional well-being and do things that make you feel good. Surround yourself with positive people who support you and make you feel good about yourself.

It's important to remember that being lied to is not a reflection of your worth or value as a person. By taking the time to process your emotions, communicating your feelings, assessing the relationship, seeking support, and taking care of yourself, you can begin to heal and move forward.

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