In order to be a good listener, you have to listen with all your attention. That means planning to listen.
Distractions hinder hearing. Take care of any bodily functions before you listen. If you are thinking about how quickly you can get to the bathroom, or how hungry you are,you really aren’t able to focus where you need to.
Turn off alarms, cell phones (unless that is what you are using to talk, in which case, make sure your call won’t be interrupted), radio off, and so on. That block of time is needed to be a narrow focus – just your person. Turn off your need to be right. Turn off knowing what actions the other person should take. Remember even if they make what you perceive to be a mistake, they are learning and growing just how they need to in order to become who they are. Be there. Be fully engaged. The rest of the world can wait just a bit. This gift of listening with full attention is extremely validating and helps the person you are listening to know they matter.
Try HOLD and see if it’s right for you: https://www.hearingoutlifedrama.com/book-online